SIX OVERHEARD WORDS

Angels, bad days, diarrhea, hot phones.

OVERHEARD II

Overheard at a Stake Conference:
"Angels will go before you on your right hand and your left."

Overheard at a writing critique group:
"I'm thriving in my new energy." When this statement was met with blank stares, the person added, "That's code for 'I'm having a bad day.'"

A little girl talking to her mother. Her mother was holding a brand new baby:
"Momma, you are not a good sharer."

Overheard in a restaurant:
“I don’t know how she continues to live. She talks so much she never takes a breath."

In a parking lot—enjoying a relationship with a disease, I guess:
“I’m doing so well with my diarrhea.”

A sign seen in a store:
If you want breakfast in bed sleep in the kitchen.

On a televised training conference:
Perfect love of the Lord casteth out fear.

Two young mother’s talking:
“My kids have been violent since school let out.”

A little boy talking a mile a minute to his mother:
“Today, on the trampoline we played fetch with raisins.”

Husband, talking to his wife about her gallivanting--with a friend--for several hours when she said it would be just ONE hour!
"You two can't see each other anymore. You're a bad influence on each other. You're supposed to lift each other up. Maybe you two should be grounded."
Then there was much laughter.

Talking to a friend on the phone when she said:
“I’ve got to go now. My phone’s hot.”

And so, it goes. At this time in my life I'm too old to be grounded, I might or might not be thriving in my new energy, and my phone might be the only hot thing about me. But, on the more optimistic side, I have angels going before me on my right hand and my left. What more could anyone ask?

OVERHEARD IN VARIOUS PLACES AT VARIOUS TIMES

I've been keeping a note or two of things I've overheard here and there.


In our family room:

Minkey, our annoying, Burmese cat was complaining, meowing, with his smoker’s voice. Phil said, “Minkey, you need your own little house with it’s own little fireplace.” He paused a long time and then said, “In Burma.”


At the cemetery:

Woman: “Oh I forgot to bring flowers.”

Man: “Well,” he said, pointing to a headstone, “there’s some over there.”


At a restaurant:

Young man: “What can they do, fire me?


At a gathering:

Young woman: "You’re early.”

Man: “Yup, I got the worms.”


At a gathering:

"She's been in love with him since she was fifteen."


At my Personal History group:

"I like to play video games on the computer but I know it's a waste of time so I started listening to the the scriptures while I play. Is that wrong, somehow?"


In our Sunday School class:

"We've decided we have to grow up and quit spending money whenever we want to." Then he paused and looked crestfallen. "I sure hate it."


Also at our Personal History group:

"I started out in geology but then I realized that rocks don't have any personality."

Between a husband and wife.

Woman: "What was a noise?"

Man: "It was a duck in my pants and I shot it. There might be more because they come in flocks. You never see a lone duck."

(I had a hard time not snorting when I overheard this.)

At a restaurant:

"I couldn’t get to sleep last night; I just couldn’t get comfortable. Then I found a piece of popcorn in my belly button."

Overheard about a man and woman who had ten kids. He was a grumpy fellow, I guess.

"Well, he must have been happy ten times, anyway."