GOOD FRIENDS, LOTSA LAUGHTER

This is one of my dearest friends.* We both moved into the subdivision umpteen years ago within a couple of months. Even though she moved later we have always stayed close.

Her daughter--Ms. Business Woman** and Gilmore Girl were two or three years apart in school and were friends.

Tonight Gilmore Girl said, "Do you remember the Christmas I called you to see if you got a Pound Puppy and YOU WERE STILL IN BED?" They go way back and have lots of good memories.

We laughed and took pictures of each other.

We laughed so much there was wiping of eyes.I thought we should have at least taken pictures of the food so here it is. Too late. We ate at Thai Drift in north Orem. The food is very good. There is nothing so pleasurable as good food and good friends. Tonight was some of the best.

* This woman and I have been through some tough times together. She is always laughing. When she calls and I don't tell Phil who is on the phone he always knows. How does he know? Because I laugh almost the whole time I am on the phone.

**She manages a "Massage Envy" in California--with about 45 massage therapists--and only gets home to Utah about once a year. It's been years since we've seen her. Her mom keeps us posted on her comings and goings and always there are fond memories of the two of them growing up together.

I HURT SOMEONE'S FEELINGS YESTERDAY

Oh joy, how did this happen? I hurt someone's feelings yesterday. I asked her to do something. I was supposed to say, "What do you think about this idea?"

I think people take offence to easily. Why did such a little thing bother this woman and that she came to my house to tell me so. She must be really, really peeved at me.

What should I do?

I've apologized. Twice. The second apology is in a letter that will be mailed tomorrow. I talked to Phil about it and he gave me some words of comfort. The next person I need to talk to is Heavenly Father. I hope she was comforted too but I worry.

And I'll tell you what else. I'm weary of people taking offence when none was given. I can't tell you the amount of times I have decided that relationships were more important than supposed offence. I've learned that a thick skin is a desirable fashion statement.

It took me a while to come to this position. When I was a teenager I took offence easily and was the one who was hurt in the long run. I'll give you one example--I could give you another one but it still hurts, my stupidity was overwhelming and I never made it right. A relationship was lost. In fact, because one relationship was lost, more were lost, too. It was my fault and I have no way of undoing it. I think of this person often and wish we were still friends.

Here's the one I will tell you about. I was corresponding with a girl who lived in Alaska. She was older than me, so articulate, had beautiful penmanship, was funny and wise and was all things that I was not. One day she said something like, "I've overspent. Do you want to make me a loan?" I took it personally, thinking she was really asking me for money, which, of course, wasn't true. I quit writing. What on earth was the matter with me?

She wrote and asked if she had offended me. I was so petty I wouldn't answer her letters.

I have missed her friendship all these years. I have grieved over this loss, too. I've tried to find her but so much time has gone by that I can't even remember her name. I remember her sister's name--Janet. They had relatives in Annabella, I can't remember who the relative was--I'm thinking it might have been her grandma.

So, if you know someone who grew up in Anchorage, Alaska, who has a sister named Janet and has ties to Annabella, Utah please tell her I'm sorry I was such a thin-skinned fool and that I've missed her.

And then I'm going to go lick today's wounds and try to do better.

MAMMA MIA

Friday night, after most of the Opening Exercises of the Olympics I got a call from Pam. "Wanna go to Mamma Mia in eight minutes?" Of course I did. We were even on time.

Phil will be astonished!
Mamma Mia was a story about a girl, raised in the Greek Islands. She's getting married.
She found her mother's diary, telling her the possibile identity of her father.
One of three. She invited them to her wedding. They came.
Her mother, Meryl Streep--who was fantastic in the role--lost it.
Pierce Brosnan was one of the three. Since the movie was a musical, Pierce sang. Every time he sang the audience laughed. Imagine. Bond. James Bond. Singing. Well, it was funny.

I tried to find a photo of the boys on the island, dancing on the dock. I laughed until I couldn't breathe. There were so may parts that were laugh-out-loud funny. Even the credits, after the movie, were funny. Don't leave early!
Some of the scenes were hysterical. Some had some swears. One, that I can think of, although funny, was suggestive. That's how the man-of-bad works, making bad things funny. I'm sorry I laughed. I'm repenting, real soon. Right now. Repenting.

Mmm, James. Er...I mean, Sam. And this little gal, who played Sophie, can really sing. Her name is Amanda Seyfried

Do you have friends like this? We ALL should have friends like this. Friends who you can be knock-down silly with. Friends with history, maybe, or maybe they are new friends. I wish you all friends, forever friends like I have. I am so lucky.

Now, we just need to learn to dance.

And sing. And live in Greece.

Pam and I are going to buy the music and learn to dance and then watch out! Mamma Mia.

NEIGHBORS BEARING GIFTS

Tonight three neighbors came over to sit on the lawn swings and visit. Honestly, I don't know how I rate such great friends. Not only do I enjoy their friendships but they brought gifts. Genny, whose garden is always at least two weeks ahead of ours, brought crookneck squash, the cutest tiny zucchini and bunches of broccoli. My crookneck hasn't even bloomed yet and my broccoli was interesting. You know the meaning of "interesting," don't you? It means, "Holy cow! What happened here? This isn't how things are supposed to go!" Then if things get really interesting you say, "Hey, this isn't my real life! Someone else has my real life. What is this anyway? Some weird person's life!"

My broccoli grew, started to make broccoli heads--tiny ones--and then, almost overnight it bloomed! I didn't get ANY broccoli. So, I am thrilled to have my neighbor's wonderful broccoli. I love broccoli. And I love my neighbor, Genny.

The other neighbor, Jo...let me backtrack. I am always trying to get my friends to join my personal history group. Perhaps I nag. Okay, I'll be honest. I nag. So, Jo was on the receiving end of my nagging. I'm sure I drove her nuts. She finally said, "I'll do it on my own." And she did!

Her daughter sent her one of those memory prompt books and told her mom, "I want this back on my birthday next year," but it didn't suit Jo's needs so she wrote her history and had it bound and gave it to her daughter for her birthday. She brought the finished product for me to read. I covered up her last name, in case of shyness.

I am on page seven and its been fascinating. I can't wait to read the rest of it.

This picture was taken about the time we moved in, years and years ago. I can't remember Jo looking like this, that's what happens when you are around people for years and years--you change, they change and you hardly know it.

Her daughter, the one in the middle in the back is one of my dearest friends, too. She is a gem. She came over tonight with Jo. She is always interested in my life, just like a good friend should be and I am interested in her life too. She has a fascinating life. But, not interesting, either. Her life is interesting in the non-wide-eyed way.

I am lucky. I have great friends. I hope you do too.

MESSAGES FROM MICHIGAN

I have a friend who is vacationing in Michigan. She and her husband are at a campground with her sister and her brother-in-law, and other extended family members. I have had three phone calls from this friend. The last two did not begin with "Hello," but went something like this.

"Hello," I said.

"Tell her there was nine caramels in her bag," said my breathless friend. (I sent a bag of a dozen caramels to my friend's sister, who they are camping with.)

'Give me that phone," I heard the sister say as she wrestles the phone from my friend. "Hello, Lynne?"

"Hi, Kathie" I said.

"Lynne, how many caramels were in my bag THAT HAD BEEN OPENED!? Oh, by the way, thanks so much for the caramels," she said, exuding charm. "Now, Lynne," she said, getting right back to her subject. "Just how many caramels were in my bag?"

"Twelve," I said.

"TWELVE? I KNEW IT! THREE ARE MISSING. I saw one in Wendy's sweatshirt. Okay, fess up, who have my other two caramels?" I hear hysterical laughter in the background. "Oh, sorry, Lynne," she said, coming back on the line, "but SOMEONE HAS STOLEN SOME OF MY CARAMELS. By the way, did I say thanks?"

My friend came back on the phone and we talked all the while I could hear her sister giving the laughing members of her family the third degree.

That was Saturday. I got another phone call today.

"Hello," I said.

"Lynne," my friend said, "They have STOLEN MY caramels!"

I can hear more hysterical laughter in the background.

My friend continues, without hardly taking a breath. "I went in the trailer to get my caramels TO SHARE, I WAS GOING TO SHARE THEM," I hear her shout to the hooting crowd, "and they were not on the table, where I had left them, so I look in the fridge but they are not in the fridge, so I go outside and I say, 'who stole my caramels?' and I look at my sister and her face is bright red and I say, 'You did it, Kathie,' and she says, 'Gayle made me do it.'" By now my friend doesn't have enough breath left to make a squeak and I hear waves of laughter coming from everyone else.

Well, we talked a few minutes more, all the time she is shouting accusations at the laughing crowd and finally she says, "Well, I better go. Thanks for providing us with something to laugh about around the campfire."

I'm glad to oblige. I just wish I had sent caramels to someone else. I'm beginning to look forward to these phone calls where no one says "Hello," but just starts right in, telling me about thievery among family. I'm glad I could be the catalyst for interesting phone calls. We all do what we can in life and if I can't contribute life-changing-events I'm glad to have proviced laughter. I'm nice, like that.

SIX WORD TUESDAY 7-1-08

Friends share happy and sad times.

OLD FRIENDS ARE THE BEST FRIENDS

I just got a call from a friend I've known for 31 years. She was in our ward and neighborhood for a few years and then moved. We've stayed close. We hardly ever do anything together anymore but it doesn't matter. She calls and it's like time has stood still.

I remember one time one of us called the other and said, "We need to talk." We met in some little dive and had dessert. We both said, "I've got some bad news." We talked and listened, cried, hugged and took deep breaths and got on with our lives. It was comforting to know someone else was dealing with hard times while I was too. I wanted her life to be easy, wanted mine to be easy too, but it wasn't. We grew stronger together.

We used to sneak away when we could and go to late movies together. It seems like that was the only time we could schedule, when the kids were taken care of and in bed. We've laughed more than is believable. Phil says he always knows when I'm talking to Cheryl on the phone because of all the laughter.

I don't know what my life would have been like without Cheryl in it. When we bought this house it was second choice. The house we really wanted, the one we had an offer on, was sold to someone else for a cash offer. We didn't blame the seller but we really were kind of "bummed." How glad I am that didn't get that house. So many things would have been different.

Things work out. Life goes on. Friends come and go but some stay friends forever.

I have a lot of those forever friends. When I see them it's like I open my heart up and let my vulnerability show. I can do that. I trust them, they would never betray me even though our lives only touch occasionally. They are old friends. Best friends.

Some old, best friends are even relatively new but they already have the "old" and "best" friend label. I know where they'll be in twenty years. Right where Cheryl is now.

I am blessed.