HABIT--GIVING UP SUGAR--STILL--KIND OF

I gave up sugar how many days ago? Eleven, but who's counting? Hardly any time at all, you say. Honestly, the first few days were easy. Then, yesterday and today the gnawing of the hand began. I finally ate a teaspoon of honey and a handful of blueberries today, not that they helped.

So I googled habit and here's some interesting things I found here.

Three to four weeks is all the time you need to make a habit automatic.

Right. If I don't kill someone before a month is up.

Around two weeks into your commitment it can be easy to forget. Place reminders to execute your habit each day or you might miss a few days.

Right. Like I'm going to forget. My raw and bleeding hand, that I've been gnawing, will remind me for sure.

Get a Buddy - Find someone who will go along with you and keep you motivated if you feel like quitting.

Right. Who is stupid enough to give up sugar? Only people who want a new and improved mental illness.

Form a Trigger - A trigger is a ritual you use right before executing your habit (or not executing the old habit, I guess). If you wanted to wake up earlier, this could mean waking up in exactly the same way each morning. If you wanted to quit smoking you could practice snapping your fingers each time you felt the urge to pick up a cigarette.

Right. People would ask me if I had an invisible i-pod and was snappin' to the oldies--ALL DAY LONG.

Replace Lost Needs - If you are giving up something in your habit, make sure you are adequately replacing any needs you’ve lost.

Right. I'll start sucking rocks. It will just look like a Tootsie Pop.

Use “But” - A prominent habit changing therapist once told me this great technique for changing bad thought patterns. When you start to think negative thoughts, use the word “but” to interrupt it. “I’m no good at this, but, if I work at it I might get better later.”

His name was Dr. Therapist Butt, for sure. (Forgive me. And on a Sunday, too.)

Remove Temptation - Restructure your environment so it won’t tempt you in the first thirty days. Remove junk food from your house, cancel your cable subscription, throw out the cigarettes so you won’t need to struggle with willpower later.

Have you read labels lately? Sugar is in everything. If it's not sugar it's corn syrup, which is worse as it messes with normal brain function. No wonder our schools are full of attention deficit kids. So, the cupboards would be bare and the broccoli would be calling my name, maybe?

Associate With Role Models - Spend more time with people who model the habits you want to mirror.

Give me a break. If I could catch up with the skinny-non-sugar-eating women of the world, I'd do it.

Write it Down - A piece of paper with a resolution on it isn’t that important. Writing that resolution is. Writing makes your ideas more clear and focuses you on your end result.

And my house would look like this.

Know the Benefits - Familiarize yourself with the benefits of making a change.

Benefit #1. I'm cranky. Benefit #2. I eat more because I am never satisfied. Benefit #3. I don't have to bother entertaining because I'm so cranky no one wants to come over. Shall I continue?

This represents cranky me on the right. All other people, on the left.

Well, that about covers it. I'm still off sugar, if you don't count the tsp. of honey--oh, and the non-sugar cookies my favorite Jr. Writer left on my doorstep. By the way, CJ, I sent you a thank-you email but I have just learned my emails have been depositing in the great Internet garbage can in the sky and haven't been reaching people. Consider yourself hugged and send that recipe to me, pronto!

I'll close with this quote by Woody Allen, who is a cad but says some brilliant things.

"Eighty percent of success is showing up."- Woody Allen (1935 - )

I'M OFF SUGAR

'Two days now I haven't eaten sugar. Kind of.

Day one: I ate two cake crumbs before I remembered. They were delicious.

Day two: I ate one Jr. Mint before I remembered. I hadn't swallowed yet so I spit it out. It was a sad thing, witnessing that chocolaty spit going down the drain.


My sister is off sugar too. She is going to stay off sugar until her cruise so she can loose five pounds so she can gain five pounds on the ship. I am not jealous. I am not jealous. I am not jealous. Not jealous of the cruise or the five pounds.


I am sure you can hear the sincerity in my voice.



Tonight, instead of eating a tasty treat I am eating pistachios.



And I'm drinking lots of water. So, the salty pistachios and the water will combine and I will GAIN five pounds.

But, I'll have the satisfaction of knowing I'm off sugar. Two whole days. Wanna go off sugar with me? I hear there is strength in numbers.

TONY PACKO'S PICKLES

I'm not from Toledo. I'm not Hungarian. I've never eaten a Tony Packo hot dog or anything else Tony Packoish but my friend, Pam, who goes homeward bound at least once a year brought me a jar of Tony Packo pickles. It sat on my counter for a month while my fridge complained about the number of jars I have stuffed in it's stomach. Finally I said, "I'm the keeper of the kitchen and if I want a jar of curry sauce in your innards I'll have a jar of curry sauce there."

Just between you and me I have no desire to make curry soon or maybe even ever. Nor do I have plans for the Vietnamese chili sauce, the red piping gel or the organic unpasteurized miso sauce but I paid good money for them....you know how it goes. But the jar of pickles, now that is something I would eat so in the fridge they went, nestled with the sweet and sour sauce, crushed garlic and ginger, three kinds of homemade jam and a jar of malted barley powder. What on earth did I buy malted barley powder for. If I throw it out I'll need it by Friday.

One night, went I was fanaticizing about the deliciousness, satisfaction and guilt that two dozen hot chocolate chip cookies would bring into my sugar-deprived life, I searched desperately for something, anything to take the craving away. One bite of the sweet, hot, very salty Tony Packo pickle was just what I wanted.

Who knew this was the cure for sugar cravings? Does the Universe know? Weight Watchers? Do they know? Do the Tony Packo people, themselves know?

Shouldn't these unusual pickles be packed four to a nifty little plastic package and sold in vending machines as the alternative for people contemplating Hershey diabetic comas?

Shouldn't someone notify Tony Packo's and tell them of my brilliant idea?

And grocery stores everywhere should sell Tony Packo's pickles so I can get my next fix without paying $12.95 for two jars and $11.87 shipping. If I want the pickles to get here in three days I can pay $24.55 shipping or $32.59 for the two day rush. Good grief! It would be cheaper to staple my lips together and pay the drugstore for penicillin.

While I was rummaging in the fridge I found six pint jars of unidentifiable homemade something or other. Salad dressing maybe? Shouldn't I clean the fridge out? Wouldn't that be the responsible thing to do? Shouldn't I throw the bottle out that held Bubbies Sauerkraut and now just hold Bubbies Sauerkraut juice with a stray kraut floating here and there? No. I shouldn't. I have to blog and read other people's blogs. That's a perfectly good reason.

And I need to contact the Tony Packo people and get them right on to that vending machine idea. Now that's the responsible thing to do.