The Brown Dot brought his new toy. He regularly buys new toys from Woot.com. This new toy is a infrared laser thermometer.
"What good is it?" someone asked.
He looked like everyone in the room had lost their minds. "What good is it? I've always wanted to know the temperature of things. Look!" And then he showed, and told us the temperature of everything IN THE WHOLE HOUSE.
Don't mind the tower of Babel Christmas boxes, waiting to be unloaded.
Yes, he demo'd the temperature of the inside of his nostril. Lucky us, to know the temperature of his nostrils. 
His toes are cooler than his foot.
We now know the temperature of Phil's ear.
The fridge was very cool. But not as cool as the freezer.
The fireplace took first place. It was 600 degrees. And this, children, is why you do not leave the fire on when you leave the house for two hours like we did yesterday. Do as we say, not as we do.
Jesus was one degree cooler than Heavenly Father in our print of the stained glass of The First Vision in the Palmyra Temple, New York. Or maybe it was the other way around. It's hard to tell Jesus from Heavenly Father.
Mary Poppins gave her dad a hug and I, the ever alert photographer, always on the lookout for family unity, took their picture. The Brown Dot, being my child, pulled a face.
I sighed. "Retake," I said. Another face. I sighed again. "Retake."
He is ever willing to show me new photography techniques and take my temperature at the same time.
And then he almost cooperated. Mary Poppins ALWAYS cooperates.
On the way out the door he took one last reading.
"Look'it, Ma," he said. He calls me "Ma" sometimes, just like a real redneck. "The snow is seven degrees."
And then he and my darling grandchild departed in the seven degree weather and went home.
I am so lucky to have a quirky son. I'm also lucky to know about Woot--it's a fun place to check every day. Like I need one more Internet site to check every day.
May you all have a lovely night and perhaps, if you've been good this year, Santa will leave a laser temperature gun in your stocking and then you too can take the temperature of your nostril and everything else. And if you are lucky enough to have a mother like me you can announce the results to her and make a faces when she takes your picture. She will be so proud.
