A SYMBOL OF LOVE

This is a symbol of love. Phil bought this for me for Valentine's Day. I have it in the kitchen window and every time I see it I remember he loves me. Me with the insecurities, the sometimes loudness--okay, when it's spring, summer or fall and its WARM, and I'm not worried I will FREEZE TO DEATH, and the lawn swings are out, and we have friends stop by--well, then I am noisy and "Hallooo, come over and visit!" type loud person and I laugh every chance I get. I have even been known to snort on the odd occasion. I am so blessed to be loved by someone like Phil, when I snort.

And this winter, the Winter of The Endless Frozen Narnia winter, when I am blue and worried and anxious and upset and weepy and not-loud and not "Halloooing" to anyone, he still loves me. He loves me in the good and the not so good. I am so lucky to have him in my life, to be married to him in the Lord's temple and to know he will be with me through eternity. I will be better then. There will be no insecurities, no blues, and no fear. There will be joy with all the members of the earth, loving each other, remembering each and every one.

Until then, I wonder how I can show Phil I love him. There is no adequate way. I don't cook like I used to. Maybe he could remember those tasty dinners and think, she loved me because she cooked. She still loves me; she just doesn't cook. We need to eat "cleaner" anyway so we can toddle into our golden years with better health. Tonight he ate a bowl of fresh fruit. Apples, grapes and oranges. For a snack later he ate raw cashews and dates. Not a bad dinner. I didn't even cut up his fruit; he did it himself so I can claim no part of fixing his dinner.

So, how can I show him I love him? I guess I will try to be a better Lynne. A nicer Lynne. A not-so-blue Lynne. I don't know if I can be a not-so-loud Lynne--when I'm not frozen or thinking I'm going to be frozen, that is. I will try to be a better member of the church and do a better job in my calling. I will try to have faith and not fear.

Oh, and I know he would like me to do more housework, get rid of the clutter, either give away or throw away a whole lot of stuff. How am I going to do that? I'm not a tidy person. I have other talents--they have not shown up yet but I'm sure I have them--they are just waiting until my twilight years and then they will show up and he will be impressed. Of course, by then he might be too old to see them. Ha ha.

I wish they would hurry, while his eyesight is still good. Until then I hope he knows I love him. I really do.

OVERHEARD IN THE CAR ON VALENTINE'S DAY

We were in the car. Phil glanced over at a woman shoveling yesterday's record-breaking snow off her driveway.

"Look at that," he said. "That woman's old."

"The poor thing," I said. "Her husband left her for a hottie. He should be ashamed of himself."

"Her husband died," he said. "She wore him out. No, that's not it. He doesn't even have the strength to leave because he is so emaciated and weak because she quit cooking."

We laughed because it's a well-known fact around here that I don't cook as often as I used to.

Later we were following a red Mini Cooper down University Ave. It was going slow and weaving over the line.

"I'll bet he's on the phone," Mr. Can't-Stand-To-Drive-Behind-Irratic-Drivers-Who-Are-Usually-on-Cell-Phones said. "Can you see?"

"No, the seat back is too high."

Finally Phil changed lanes, gunned the motor and we zipped past. I looked at the driver. It was a well-kept, blond woman, her make-up was perfect, she had on darling silver earrings and I could see she was well dressed.

"It's a woman," I said, "and she's not on a cell phone."

"Not on a cell phone?" he said, glancing at her.

"No, and she's pretty too."

She's old," he said.

"She's not old."

"She's sixty," he said.

I laughed, we both laughed but the fact is that I was born in 1946. You do the math.

VALENTINE'S DAY CHOCOLATES

This is where I dashed today to pick up a little Valentine treat. "I'll be right back," I told Mr. I'll-Wait-In-The-Car.

And then I saw this line; actually it was longer than this when I got there. I called him. "I'll be at least 20 minutes. Do you have anywhere you can go?" Deseret Book is right there and Mr. Church-Bookworm loves browsing in Deseret book.

"Twenty minutes? TWENTY MINUTES?"

"It might be a half hour."

"Come back later, come tomorrow," Mr. Impatience said.

"Like tomorrow, which is VALENTINE'S DAY, is going to be less busy?"

There was grumbling on the line which meant, "Do what you want." So I waited in line and chatted with people about their particular candy choices.

If I wanted pre-packaged chocolates I could have gone to the quick check out. Five minutes tops. Look at all these beauties. And I just buy Bourdeaux. Although, if the box were for me there would be equal Bordeaux, brown sugar squares and molasses chips. This information is just in case anyone is taking note and making a list for my birthday. CoughJune7thcough.

And look at this cheerful face. It was worth the wait to be greeted by someone as cute as this. She gave me a free piece of candy and guess what? It was a Bourdeaux. The angels whispered in her ear, I'm sure of it.