Monday, June 8, 2009


I shouldn't be blogging. I'm dead on my feet. I still have manuscripts to read before my Writer's for Young Reader's class tomorrow. Claudia Mills is my teacher and she's fabulous. If you ever "do" Writer's for Young Readers and Claudia is teaching you should be in her class. She is also nice. How can anyone be so nice? Nice and talent sometimes don't go together but she makes it work. And she's a philosophy professor at University of Colorado. So she's smart, talented, nice and funny. She got several people's talent and they are left with only their bodily functions, functioning. Probably.

I follow 42 blogs plus there are several more I check daily that don't have the "follower" feature, but I only read three tonight. I read my daughter's , because she's my daughter and she blogged about me, my daughter-in-laws, because I love her like a daughter and then there is Shan, who's title pulled me right in: The Three Pound Poop. I had to read that one. I looked at all the others with longing but had to save them for tomorrow.

Lord Bumhampton had a friend once who had a similar problem as Shan's little friend. He left an offering in the downstairs toilet. It wouldn't flush. That is the honest truth. It was impressive! It wouldn't flush for many times. He was a good sport about it and later told me, "All my family have the same problem but we solved it. We now take fiber!"

So, if you have a poopage problem, take a little fiber. And if you don't you should probably write something. Or blog. Or be a philosophy professor. Or at least be nice.

And when this week is over I have another Mrs. Bird story to tell you. Stay tuned.

PS I probably shouldn't say the word, "poop" on a blog should I? When I typed it into the "labels" I see I've talked about it before. I really should repent. Probably.


Colette Amelia said...

ahhh now I know I am home! You make my world better! Thank you! (did you notice all the exclamation points?)

Tierney said...

I am so glad you are enjoying your workshop. Did you know you are an example of nice and talented meeting? And thank you for sharing Shan's story, since I don't follow her blog. Stories such as this are...important.

zelzee said...

Anyone who doensn't enjoy your stories...........well, just poop on them!

Karen Deborah said...

Not say poop? the alternatives are either icky or um too medical, would the flow of your story be quite as entertaining if you said a 3 pound unflushable bowel movement? NOT
so good that's settled then.

You are hilarious you know.

Bonnie said...

I used to have a similar problem, but my doctor told me to take Benefiber every day. I have been doing so for a year and It totally solved my problem. Benefiber Rocks--literally.

Annette said...

You follow 42 blogs!! You are such a good friend to so many. I'm glad you are having a good week. Just don't wear yourself out.

Shawn said...

How fun to take a workshop! You are so talented, and I am sure that she loves having you in class.

And I am up to following about 60 blogs----sigh---I'm just a girl who can't say no.

Shan said...

I must say that I feel the most honored of all honoredness that out of 42 blogs you read mine because it said the word poop in it. I honestly think that I want to write a kid's book called Roxie and the Three Pound Poop. It wouldn't be the actual Roxie story, but that title cannot go to waste. I've been working on it in my head, but I haven't settled on a good story line yet. It's just itching to be written down, though. Maybe you can put that into your little head and think about it too. We could co-author a poop book. It'd be great fun!

TeamGornold said...

i feel so complemented that you checked my blog and it wasn't even a poop story!
now that is love!

love you!

tearese said...

my sister's three year old has giant poop issues too... no wonder she doesn't want to be potty trained.
If you read that many blogs, I guess I can overlook it if mine isn't visited that often.
I love your flowers in the new header!

Shell said...

First, Claudia Mills is absolutely nice, you are right. It has been a delight spending this week with her.

Second, you are easily as nice as she is and it has been an equal delight spending this week with you. I told you I was serious about your breakfast bar recipe, and I still have to go hunt that down, but

Third, anything that highlights a three pound poop has to be read. My princess (who is not as little, but I think just as cute) poops like a sailor. Or a lumberjack. Or an ox. (Though we've never weighed it.) It is stunning what comes out of that skinny body, and since she often forgets to flush, we often get to see it.

Almost forgot. You, Lynne, are also an extremely talented writer (and cook--I took an extra caramel for my husband but now I'm not so sure I want to share). I truly have enjoyed spending this week with you. You have been a generous and gracious co-workshopper/Claudia's assistant.